"NO, MOMMY! I WANT OUT!"
Screams of independence come from the bed of my little, defiant two-year-old. A knowledge that, somehow, now that she has found this gifting, the ability to climb to freedom, she is no longer in need of sleep. And she is definitely not in need of a mother to guide her.
For 45 minutes the screams came. The defiant independent screams of a two-year-old who demonstrated the day before her new talent. Three piggy tales, pink puffy ballet dress and all, she climbed out of her pack and play to freedom. Followed by a sweet smile and "I do myself!" she was the complete picture of independence.
"I WANT OUT!" Her voice hoarse and weak from the tens of minutes of screaming.
"He will take great delight in you; he will quiet you with his love; he will rejoice over you with singing." The words fill my head as I once again gently put her back in her bed and whisper, "I love you; you need to sleep." Somehow today my patience is greater than most days. The cries of my child echo the cries I hear to my Father, "I WANT OUT! I WANT TO GO! NOW!" while sitting in a place, stuck in a place I really do not want to be. And I hear "He will quiet you with his love." Though I am weary and weak from yelling; sometimes not yelling; sometimes on my knees whispering prayers, but still weary.
I know it is best to be patient in the place; to rest; to be still, just like I wish she knew it was best. And finally, collapsing, she continues to yell for 45 minutes, but now so tired, she is laying in her bed. Then quiet. Rest.
The LORD your God is with you,
the Might Warrior who saves.
He will take great delight in you;
in his love he will no longer rebuke you,
but will rejoice over you with singing.