Thursday, January 31, 2013

A blessing

Yesterday we took our first step of faith in this process. We sent in the application for adopting Hamilton. It seems like such an easy first step, but it takes money and courage, something I find lacking in me daily. But we did it.

I prayed as I sealed the envelope and sent it off.

And I hesitated to write on here. We have mostly had support from people, encouraging us as we start this journey.  However, there are those, those I love dearly, that think and have told us we are unwise, or selfish or should be more cautious. And honestly, I understand that, I understand the thought. I might have the thought myself.

But right now, for whatever reason, God is speaking so loudly that this is His heart, this is where we belong. Yesterday a woman shared in our Bible Study about a family getting ready to move to Haiti to live and serve with her family and small children. This woman told someone worried for their safety, that the safest place for her and her family is right in the center of God's will. Outside of where God has called us is the most dangerous place. I think she is right. I think that it is also one of the hardest things to do in this culture. To live a life that is not safe. But God never called us to live a safe life. He has called us to live a life of courage, of faith. If we live a safe life, we are not living a life that let's God do God size things.

And this is just one small thing, this adoption, of one orphan in a world with millions of orphans. Nothing glamorous, probably it will be painful and messy at times. And this might not be wise in the way the world is wise. And I am jumping full in without caution because if I thought too hard I would come up with a million reasons why to not do this, but those are the things I need to think about. The ones I do not need to think about, the ones that come right to my head, those are the reasons we should do this. God has called us to walk in faith, not fear, being doers of the Word.

Sometimes we wait for the blessings, sometimes we will wait until Heaven. Sometimes it comes with just a little reassurance. Yesterday, after putting our application for adoption in the mail, we got an email... we had an offer on our house and another one expected that day. We listed our house last May.  There have been no offers. I had heard there were finally a few people interested, but on the day we took our step of faith God met us with this blessing. I am such a mess and I fail all the time, but every once in a while I take that step of faith, and I am never sorry I did. The opportunity to see God work, to see Him move mountains is something that will always draw me back toward the edge.

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