31 Days of "Things I have Learned from my Children..." Sometimes the best thing is to just slow down

This may be a cop out on my goal of posting every day for 31 days. However, after a night of VERY little sleep and a day with even less rest, I am reminded of the importance of slowing down. I have learned that sometimes the best thing for my family and I is to stop trying to complete the "to do list", just walk away and rest.

Also in a world that is full of hurt and heartache, I am holding on to little ones and spending time just spending time with them.

So that is all for tonight. Slowing down and counting my blessings...

21. A pile of books ready to be read to littles all in warm pjs with freshly brushed teeth.
22. A baby who is sleeping safely in her bed.
23. Cool night air
24. Feet that heal
25. Running
26. New friends, more and more new friends
27. The sneaky smile of a two year old stealing almonds
28. Songs that people are gifted enough to write, that speak to my heart in a way my own head won't
29. A Heavenly Father that hears the cries of our heart, even if we can only whisper them
30. A Father who forgives a hundred times over

31 Days of "Things I have Learned from my Children"...the need to create

Red, yellow and green hand prints covered the white walls and carpet. Thoughts of, "What is wrong with these people!" and "Their parents are going to kill me!" are running through my head as I am wrangling these two children I have agreed I will babysit. I was a freshman in college and I could not believe this was happening to me. I swore up and down that if I ever had children they would NEVER act this way.

BUT years later...

My little one year old has completely colored herself in black marker, herself and her chair.

Black paint is covering the walls, floor, chair and feet of my little boy.

And, I can feel my hair standing on end as I once again ask, in a voice getting close to a shout, "PLEASE PICK UP ALL THE PIECES OF PAPER OFF THE FLOOR!" and while you are at it, "please pick up all the glue, stickers, markers and crayons AS WELL!"

As much as I try to stifle it; to hide all the craft supplies, the tape and glue and markers and scissors they somehow manage to find them and scatter them EVERYWHERE! and I have now turned to screaming... "NEVER AGAIN WILL YOU HAVE ANY CRAFT SUPPLIES!"

But really, it does not matter, because created in the image of God, our creator.

They.

Must.

Create.

And I look so much like them, craving writing, knitting, sewing, cooking. I have to make something. I. Must. Create.

And sometimes for us that means messy creation, but there is something about creating that makes them, us, alive. There is something fulfilling in the creating process. We have a need to create.

31 Days of "Things I have Learned from my children..." There is a time to be quiet

In the quiet of the morning after a run, I sit next to her and listen, as she pours out her heart, a dream that she does not understand. A dream that breaks her heart and mine as I realize my little girl is not so little.

And I hold my tongue, eager to just keep her talking. I hold back the advice that a mom is so quick to give.

She has been talking for the ENTIRE twenty minutes of our walk, I mention it, but only in kidding, eager again to just hear all that is on her heart. Hesitant to give any words that might stop the heart she is sharing; a heart full of joy at my undivided attention.

There is a time for a mom to listen to be quiet and wait. It is so difficult to not impart all my wisdom on their little ears. But those moments I am quiet are when I get to hear their hearts.

Hearts full of...

Fears of change, growing up, and the unknown.

Joys of friends, growing up and new things learned.

Dreams of stories, GROWING UP and all that happens in their imagination.

And for these moments while they are still young and willing to share... I will be quiet and listen, eager to be part of their worlds.

31 Days of "Things I have Learned from my Children...." Welcome

This 31 Days post is also part of 5 minute Fridays over at Lisa-Jo Baker's blog. The idea is you get a word and write on it for 5 minutes, and then you hit publish. Today's word is "Welcome"

Start

"Can we have them over?" "Please mom!" "Lets have them over for dinner and maybe they can stay and spend the night!"

My children are quick to welcome new people into our home, pretty certain that every person they meet is just a friend waiting to be made.

My response is usually "No!"

Don't they understand the meaning of this "Welcome to my home!" It means bathrooms need scrubbing, floors need washing, vacuuming needs doing and fresh cookies need baking. And there is no way I have time for all that. But their persistent nagging finds lets me give in to one "Yes" (usually once a week) And I work like crazy and secretly am thankful that I have a reason to actually clean my house.

They walk in and children scatter and toys are messed and play is had and the messier it gets I tell myself, the more fun they had. And cookies are eaten and milk spilled.

And new friends are made or old friendships are renewed. I realize the cleaning may not have been necessary as the mess has nudged back in. I am thankful to share my home and food with friends, and realize that the "Welcome" is more than a neat house and cookies, it is the door opening, saying we want you to be part of our life. You are WELCOME here, even in the mess of life, we want you to be part of life with us, because friendship is important.

STOP

31 Days of "Things I Have Learned from my Children..." There is a time for joy

Days and weeks of fighting with my two year old have left me more than a little disheartened... BUT the thing that has killed me is the fight before bed. The one that is usually necessary for her to finally fall quiet into sleep. Sometimes it seems that she actually needs this fight, to release all the extra energy necessary for rest. But I hate it. I hate putting my little girl down to sleep after a battle, knowing it will (hopefully) be hours before I see her again.

SO we have come up with new things, a new routine, it involves rocking in a chair, singing songs about stars and "gucks" (ducks) and then me praying over her until she reluctantly gives into sleep. And my heart is quiet and full of joy knowing that in the end we made it without a fight.

And I am reminded of other times I chose joy.

Times when we laughed instead of dwelling on a moment of sorrow.

Times when we told funny stories instead of being afraid in the dark.

The times we play funny games in the grocery store to avoid the screams of being TRAPPED in a cart!

Times they asked me to tell a funny story about growing up or a fun adventure I had been on, when they are sick.

We chose to find joy, laughter, rather that the sadness or frustration of the moment.

And what in the situations of discouragement and frustration of my life should I choose? I should choose to remember God's faithfulness, to tell myself my own stories of God's goodness and blessing. I should find moments to laugh when I am taking life too seriously. And I should spend a few minutes with a giggling child when I am worn out with disappointment.

Because there is a choice.

And there is a time to choose joy.

31 Days of "Things I have Learned from my Children"....Princess on a Plane

This is one of my favorite stories, I tell it every chance I get honestly. And maybe it is not a thing I learned from my children as much as a thing I learned with my children. My oldest daughter to be exact.

It happened years ago, 9 actually. We were living in Oregon at the time and a dear friend of mine was getting married in Wisconsin. I was in the wedding so heading back for all the celebration. We only had enough money for one ticket so I was traveling by myself with my baby girl. She was just four months old at the time.

It was one of the nightmare flights that make you never want to get on a flight again. We were taking a little plane from our small town in Oregon to Denver, CO and hit some really bad turbulence. I had to stay in my seat, but my darling little girl was SO fussy. The nice flight attendant offered to walk her up and down the aisles during the short flight. All the turbulence had delayed our flight. I had a connecting flight in Denver to Minneapolis where I was meeting my sister to drive over for the wedding. The flight attendants knew I had this connection so called ahead to the airport to let the flight know we were coming. They also arranged for a little cart to be waiting since we had to get to the other side of the airport. All the other passengers let us off the plane first, and we hopped on that cart and flew through the airport at the top speed of maybe 5mph, as fast as the cart can go. When we got to the gate, I realized that there was no one waiting or boarding.

"Did they wait? We called ahead to say I was coming!" I was angry. The plane had boarded and was taxiing down the runway.

"Are there any more flights tonight?" They told me no. I was going to have to get a taxi, find a hotel, spend the night and come back the next morning and see if I could get on one then.

Tears filled me eyes. "Can you ask them to come back for us, please!" I don't know how I asked, if it was in whisper through tears or yelling in frustration. But they did, they called the plane.

Hung up the phone.

And said,"They are on their way back... to get you."

We boarded that plane, messy mom, weary and teary eyed with a screaming four month old. And people stared. I am pretty certain there was some disappointment in the eyes of the passengers as I sat down in my seat. I am also pretty certain that they planned to at least see someone famous, someone important. And my heart started beating faster, I am nobody, but I AM a daughter of the King of Kings, a princess, whose Abba Father put it on the heart of the pilot to turn that plane around and come back and get His child. He then carried that plane through the air making us arrive at our destination without one bump twenty minutes early with all our luggage on board.

It does not always happen that way, but sometimes, sometimes in the rain.. that is when the blessing comes, right in the midst of a storm. Blessings poured as gifts from heaven!

31 Days of Things I Learned from my Children...hard work pays off

The encouragement and cliches roll of my tongue...

"Things worth doing are hard!"

"If it was not hard, you would not be learning anything!"

"It builds character!"

Sitting with discouraged children trying to learn math facts, memorize dates on a timeline or sounding out difficult words. It is what days in our house often look and sound like. They are frustrating and a lot of work. I often do not understand what I am missing in teaching them and they do not understand what they are missing in learning.

But I keep cheering and teaching, and they keep working. Sometimes for weeks... we work on something, sometimes months.

But then all of a sudden, it makes sense! All the, "I will never be able to do this!" Turns into "I can not believe I learned this!"

And the things that are a struggle, the things that take more time are put on the pedestal for further cheering, because she did learn all the dates on her timeline, of course, with some hard work, she can learn those spelling words.

Each day they learn more, their minds growing at speeds I could hardly fathom when I started this whole homeschooling "thing." And I am encouraged because suddenly the hard work is paying off, and they, we, are seeing the fruits of our labor.

And I am reminded of my cheers, "Things worth doing are hard." Writing is hard, but it is something I want to do and something that needs practice, so I do it in hopes that there will be fruit in my labor. Training for a race or just running at 6:00 in the morning is hard, but they are worth the hard to get a result.  And relationships are work and hard, but they are worth doing.

The satisfaction knowing that it was worth it, all the hard, which led to the "I can't believe I did it!"

This is part of a 31 Days Series,on Things I have Learned from my Children. For the first post in this series click here.

This post is also linked to Titus 2 Tuesdays