She is 3!

It is becoming a habit of mine to write to my children on their birthday, to tell them publicly how proud I am of them and how much they mean to me. It is my version of scrap booking, of commemorating a year in moment, a memory to look back on. Maybe it should be more often. But here it is, another birthday. Verity turns 3 today.

Verity, you have been full of life since the day you were born, fighting fiercely to never be forgotten. Possibly this is a fourth child's distinct personality. I was certain that I would have had this parenting thing down by now. After all I had lots of practice with the other three, but when you came into this world, you humbly showed me that I still have a lot to learn. All the tricks that worked with the others and the advice given by experts, none seemed to work for you. All that really has ever worked is to hold you and wait. So, for three years I have waited and held you, and loved you more with each passing day as I realized that this is what is right for you. And you are turning out okay. You can talk and play. You are brave and smart. You seem to know and understand far beyond the three years of your life, but you rarely let on. You are madly in love with your big brother and one of my favorite things in the world is to see the two of you set out on an adventure, superhero partners in crime, swinging through the house battling bad guys.

Your laugh and your smile make every other moment of stubbornness worth it. You fight in this world for all you believe, and my prayer for you is that one day that fight will be one worth fighting, and that your courage and stubbornness will make a world of change.

You often like to be the life of the party, dancing on the side of the swimming pool in your little swimsuit, pretend-singing in a microphone to whatever song you hear on the speakers. You will never be left out no matter how much harder you have to work or how little you understand; you HAVE to be part of it. And sometimes you surprise me as you pull up a chair, "I just want to watch," you say. Because, you know that just watching makes you a part of it.

This year of two has been full of new things. You are learning to ride a bike and bravely taking on the pool - something a year ago you would not have even put your big toe in. Today you jump in the deep end, demanding "Again! Again!" You are learning your shapes and numbers, letters and sizes. You love to make up silly songs. You also learned every adjective that describes two and took it on with gusto.

And now you are three! I am looking forward to all it brings. My only request is a little more sleep! Happy Birthday sweet Verity!

Waiting and Waiting some more

I have been waiting to write a post. Hoping and praying that when I wrote, maybe I would have news. News like, we received the copy of our homestudy! News like we have sent off for the I-800! Some news. I waited and waited. And nothing. Our homestudy is still being written. It has been read by a few people, they have submitted some changes/additions. There is still more that needs to be done. I was so sure by now it would be done. But it is not.

And I feel like we are running out of time.

We have just six months to get everything submitted, and can apply for a one month extension. But our time is getting very close. And the I-800 takes time.

We are getting ready to go out of town for Nathan to work on a film, it will be about five weeks we are gone. Five weeks that are going to be tricky. Because during those five weeks, our six months runs out and we apply for a one month extension. And we pray that it all gets done. It seems impossible. With all that we have done to get down to paperwork and waiting.

And Hamilton is waiting. He does not know yet that we are over here working to bring him home, to bring him to our family. But he is waiting and I worry. Over the past few months, stories that are not mine to share, have shown me that the lives of these children in these orphanages are fragile. Since we started this process, we have heard of two children that have not made it. The families were working to bring them home, but they went to their home in Heaven. And I worry like any mom, that we will take to long, that this child I love already SO much is in need of a mom and dad and sisters and brother will grow weary in the waiting.

So, I am asking for prayers. Prayer that God will move this mountain. That paperwork will go through governments that are slow. Prayer that the money will come in that needs to. And prayer that Hamilton is cared for until we get there.

Thank you so much for taking time to pray with us and be part of this journey with us!

The Cost of Adoption

The cost of adoption...
I think it is one of the things that deters most people from adopting. You hear the number $35,000/adoption and it is staggering. Who just has that lying around!?!
We certainly have not, I pray that one day we will, that we can just give towards adoption, to help people with this overwhelming cost. I have learned I hate asking people for things-- especially money.
But I have to face it at this point we are not one of those families that has thousands and thousands of dollars lying around for adoption. We have to rely on help. And we have had so many people help. We have reached just over $8000.00 is donations toward bringing Hamilton home. We still have a long way to go.

I just wanted to share with those who wonder why it is so expensive where all the money goes. This is just a general expense sheet not necessarily for our adoption, but just a general, international adoption.

Here it goes..
Application $500-$700 (paid)
Homestudy $1000- $3000 (paid)
Country Fees $5000-$10000
Agency Fee $6000- $8000 (half paid)
Post-Adoption $300-$1000
Adoption Education Courses $50-$150 (paid)_
United States Citizenship/Immigration Filing Fee $740
Fingerprinting$ 84
Passports (2) $270 (paid)
Notarizing $500 (so far we have someone who does this for free! Yeah!)-- although this Apostilling thing probably goes in here and it costs $2-$10/document/everything needs to be apostilled ( partially paid)
2 round trip airfares for two adults $4000-6000 (estimate)
Child's one way airfare (I can't wait til we get to get this!) $500-1000 (estimate)
In country lodging/meals $1000-3000 (complete estimate)
Medical for Child's visa $100
Child's US Visa $230
Incidentals $500 (just an estimate again!)

If you add up the least of each of these you get. $21,370 if you add up the most you get $35,274. We fall toward the upper end of things, right around $35,000.00 when all the expenses are paid.

We are very quickly coming up on paying our country fee and needing to finish our agency fee, which means in the next few weeks we need about $10,000.00. We have paid all that is listed as "paid" above with the just over $8000.00 given and have about $1500.00 in our adoption account we set up. SO that means that in the next month or two we need $8500.00. That is a big amount, but so far, God has provided what we needed when we needed it. And I will continue to humble myself and ask for help in bringing Hamilton home. If you feel led to give, please do, again, $10 can make a HUGE difference. If you have questions about all this again, please ask. We will be doing some more fundraising in the near future, but wanted to put out their our need. And again, anyone that donates $10 or more toward Hamilton's adoption, we will be signing their name on the quilt we are making for Hamilton! Thanks so much for taking time to read all this, and learning a bit about the whole adoption process with us as we wade through this big adventure.

A lot is happening!

The life of a mom, is far from boring.

There is so much going on that sometimes I forget to write it down because stopping to write means I have time, and lately time, is a luxury.

Currently I have a two year old who is attempting to potty train. She is very excited about turning three soon, pull ups and being a big girl! However the first time she went, she looked at me and said, "that was weird!" It might take us a while to get this "weird" thing called potty training down.

My two oldest have joined a swim team in town. I have learned that my oldest, my Anya, is INCREDIBLY competitive. They swim four days a week, and Anya always pushes herself. She loves the hard workouts and is thriving. Karis, likes to wave at me half way down and frequently just hangs on the side smiling. She is  not nearly as competitive, but learning to swim. Karis also continues to horseback ride. She is learning a lot and it takes a lot of courage, which has been great to see.

David has started to make some friends on his own. He and Verity spend most mornings playing in the backyard on adventures while the girls work on school. They are best friends! We tried our hand at canoeing on Sunday, we learned David is NOT a fan. Half way through the trip, he yelled, "We are never going to make it!" And Nathan and I unfortunately burst out laughing because you could touch the bottom of the creek and only have it up to your ankles, the canoe actually got stuck on the bottom. But dry land is for him. When we got to shore, he took off running!

We completed our homestudy two weeks ago for the adoption. The social worker is writing up the report and hopefully soon it will be complete. In the mean time, we have been completing the training courses, which are supposed to take twelve hours, but took closer to twenty it seemed. It is amazing to me the amount of training that goes into adoption and the requirements, at times it is very overwhelming, but I know it is necessary, and it is what we do. And we completed them, which was a huge relief. Next steps are waiting for the homestudy, then sending off for our I-800, when that comes back then everything needs to be apostilled and finally, sent as a big dossier to Bulgaria, where it will all be translated and at some point, we will go on our first trip. It will be a few months though.

In the mean time, we are set to close on our house in Wisconsin TOMORROW! After a year of waiting, it is going to be done it looks like. We are praying right now, because we are still waiting for some documents that need signing and it all needs to be over-nighted to get to Wisconsin by 10 a.m. tomorrow when they close.

And finally Nathan is making a movie and after a lot of attempts at fundraising, they have actually gotten investors and some famous people to be in the movie. I do not think I can go into it all because nothing has actually been signed, the famous people part. But it has all been a little surreal as he sits on the phone with so and so's manager after dinner. And they got distribution, which is apparently a big deal too.

And as a result of the movie we are getting ready to head to Chicago for just over a month in July. Summer is coming, we are finishing up school and get ready for lots of play dates, long days at the pool and hopefully minimal fighting!

Happy Mother's Day!

I am thankful to be a mother and for all the blessings that come with it, BUT more than that I am thankful for my mom.

Today, I want to celebrate my Mom. She would not fit the "Better Homes and Garden" stereotype of the perfect mother, if they have one. But, she is the perfect mom for me. When I was a child, she put up with my ridiculous ideas that I, in my naivete, thought would be helpful - like making her audio tapes with my voice, encouraging her. I still wonder what on earth I was thinking, but she seemed genuinely thankful. She patiently put up with my preteen, teen and young adult fits - probably my toddler ones too, but I do not remember them. I do not remember my mom ever complaining. She laughed with us frequently, and even to this day, if my mom, grandma, sister, and I get together, there is almost guaranteed to be laughter that leads to tears filling my eyes

I am thankful my mom knew her priorities and would never drain her bank account for my whims for designer jeans or shoes. She was, however, more than willing to find a way for me to see the world. She gave me wings and even sent me, at age eleven, to France on an exchange program. My mom planned vacations, camping every summer, and always supported me in my adventures. I remember thinking what an amazing mom she was during the first time she really took me shopping. It was so I would have gear for a summer backpacking trip. We never went shopping for prom dresses, but backpacking gear, that was worth time and money! She gave me memories to last a life time.

My mom and I look alike in a lot of ways, but we could not be more different in most every other way. Her love is constant though.

Thank you, mom, for being a woman I can admire - strong, brave, compassionate, adventurous, wise and thoughtful. Thank you for all you have given me and done for me.

I love you mom!
Happy Mother's Day!

We are so Thankful!

It is amazing and overwhelming each time I check my e-mail and see "you have a donation." Often the names are dear friends or family, but sometimes the names are unfamiliar - people I have never heard of or met. These people just feel called to help in adoption. To all who have given little and much, we are SO thankful!

I often think of Hamilton who has been in an orphanage his whole life. He has never been someone's whole world. Children tend to be a mom and dad's whole world when they come into this world. Usually our lives are completely changed as we adjust sleep and feeding and the quiet way we move around the house in an effort to not wake the baby. We think about everything that will affect this little life. I am excited that one day Hamilton will get to be our family's whole world while we love him the best way we know how and work to meet his needs.

But as for all those years he has not been someone's whole world, we can tell him about all the people that worked to bring him to a family. We can let him know how precious and valuable he is. And the quilt we are making will be a constant reminder.

So, just a quick update. Over the past week we have raised $734.00 toward Hamilton's adoption. We have had fourteen people give little to lots. It is amazing how $1, $5, $20 and more adds up. We have one more day with Give1Save1, so if you want to donate $1 or more, we would love for you to join us in supporting the efforts to bring Hamilton home.

Give1Save1!

We are so excited to be part of Give1Save1 Europe this week! If you are new to my blog from the Give1Save1 blog, I would love to have you read about our adoption journey. Some of the posts that describe this journey are Steps of Faith, Interruptions, Why are we Adopting, and I am not going to change the world. You can find other posts about life, birthdays, and lessons I have learned, since I have written this blog over the past couple of years. But, as Hamilton became part of our life, it has never made sense to start a new blog about his adoption because he fits with us, our family, our life. Life goes on as we move toward bringing him home. I hope that you stop by through the coming weeks and months as we continue on this journey toward bringing Hami home.